Why do I worry so much? This select soccer thing gets to me. Try outs seemed crazy, I need to let this go... My poor daughter. We are waiting to see if she gets the call. This was tough. We'll see.

Update: She didn't make it. She is really disappointed. The tryouts were tonight (wacky to do it on the last day of school, but who am I to say that?). It ran from 6pm to 9pm and they used all the minutes. 60 girls tried out for 28 positions (A Team and B Team) and some of those 28 slots were taken by the girls who were on the team last year.

Monkey Girl didn't show her best and didn't make the team. She didn't realize that she looked bored and that you can't look bored even if you are bored at a try out. She's only 10. This was quite a lesson though. I fear it will make her hate the sport she loves. Right now I'm regretting the whole try out thing. Her friend made the B Team and that makes Monkey Girl even more sad. I'm sad because I really do think she has the talent and that her talent could be developed further. It is a huge part of her identity -- be the athlete. So not making the select soccer team on the first try is a crushing blow.

In the big picture this is a blip on the radar. In our little world tonight it is devastating. Oh how painful is the hurt of our children! I just feel sick. If I had known more about this I could have prepared her better. Now I feel like a terrible mom for not knowing more about it. I didn't want to push. Maybe I should have researched and learned more. Who would have thought that boredom would be the enemy? I think that is what killed her chances.

Halfway through the 3 hour tryouts she got bored and didn't do a great job hiding it. I can understand getting bored scrimmaging on tiny fields with cones instead of goals. I understand, but I know in my heart that is what made her fade from the radar. She got quiet and played her position, but she didn't have her normal fire. She made her plays, but didn't shine. Had they played on larger (regulation type) fields she would have been able to use her speed to her advantage. The small field play allowed her to get a lot of action, but there was no real running -- the kids were right on top of each other. This isn't the kind of soccer that Monkey Girl plays. She's a sprinter who can come back to defend or move up to attack the goal. Enough soccer talk...

My poor baby. It is 11:45 and she just came down to tell me she can't sleep. I told her she can read or write in her journal. Disappointment builds character. Character building can really suck.