We had an up and down weekend. It is difficult to see a family in such deep grief. It brings back what it was like last year when my Mom passed. This family is amazing though... They have people at their home constantly right now sharing stories from their daughter's life. My family was really private -- I tend not to be so private.

I think this particular family is giving the entire community a lesson in how to grieve and deal with great loss. I saw this family welcome people into the home and friends ensured that food was provided and the place stayed clean. There was great comfort to all who came. Being able to show the family you care makes friends feel slightly less powerless and slightly comforted. Any comfort at a time of such great loss is valuable. Other friends were thrilled to serve food, clean up meals and provide hospitality. They too were comforted by being of some service. My sister was thrilled to clean the bathroom. I would have been thrilled to clean their bathroom. The beauty was that this family is allowing everyone to share their grief, to care for them, and to celebrate their daughter's life through stories and pictures. By coming together the weight is spread among those who are left behind. They are allowing everyone in during their most vulnerable time. They are inviting everyone back. I was asked to come back. I was honored. I'm not even that close to them. I am just friends with the Mom who is one of my sister's closest friends.

My sister explained her friend's view on grief to me. Prior to all if this happening this woman told everyone she knew that if anything ever happened and they were wondering whether or not to come over, they should ALWAYS come. Come if you are wondering whether or not to come. When trying to comfort my sister through her grief she explained that you must tell your story over and over. Each time you tell it you give a little piece of your grief to the listener and they carry it away. Over time it is easier to tell the stories without crying. Over time it hurts a little less. Eventually what happens is that the mourner gives away the grief of the loss and is left with the love and the appreciation for the good times they have had with the person they lost.

What an amazing way to look at the grief process. What an amazing family. I pray for their strength.