pep talk.....

I remember I used to call my Mom on the phone at and just say "Mom, I need a pep talk." This was a sign that I didn't want to talk about the problem or reason I was upset, discouraged, sad, down, humiliated, depressed or even angry. I just wanted a pep talk.

Mom gave the BEST pep talks. She would tell you "You are strong. You will get through this. Someday you may even look back at it and laugh. Maybe not, but maybe. Maybe you are just getting some character building." Then she'd throw in that quote "Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger." She often liked to throw that one in for good measure.One time I said "But Mom, don't I have enough character yet?" Her answer was, "Apparently not." If you wanted to talk about the problem, she'd listen. If you didn't, she'd listen. She was always that rock that you could lean on, the voice of calm in the storm.

If the pep talk request was made in person, a hug would be given. There is nothing like a strong and firm hug with a little pat or rub on your back. She'd tell me "Everything is going to be okay." And because SHE said it, I knew it was true. Mom had a wonderful way of being the call voice amidst the screaming furies. It didn't matter what was going wrong, we would get through it. "This too shall pass."

I am missing her today. I miss talking to her about nothing. I miss telling her the mundane stupidities of my day. Nobody listens like your mother, right? She actually cared about my silly day to day dramas. She listened like my run down of activities was interesting. She always made the time. I don't cry as much when I miss her now. I smile and think how lucky I was to have her for a Mom. I miss her.

I feel bad for my sister. Last night I saw her, and her pregnant belly is showing. And the sad part is that she can't share this with Mom. No matter what, that just stinks. I am so sorry that she doesn't have Mom for this and that she didn't have Mom at her wedding. Ugh -- that just stinks to go through these wonderful life experiences without your Mom.

My sister and I had a wonderful moment though. She showed me her pregnant belly and I asked if I could touch it. How cool that was when I felt her baby I felt her baby within! Oh the memories of pregnancy! The soft spot of the belly and then that hard feeling where the baby is -- WOW! I was so excited for her!

"I feel your baby!" is what I said, and she just stared at me. She hadn't realized that this hard spot right here was the BABY! She felt around on her belly and found her baby -- then she says "Hey! You found my baby!" It was the best moment! After all the conflict and hurt we have had, I was truly blessed to share this moment with her. It brings happy tears to my eyes to picture the look on her face -- shock, stunned, happy disbelief. "Hey! That's my baby!"

We had a great pregnancy chat (she was thinking the softness of her belly was fat -- hello, that is baby cushion!). Maybe there is hope for us. She helped me with part of my student teaching application essay too... and I found her baby! I know that she would have realized on her own eventually, but it was so cool to the the one to tell her. Today during her ultrasound the baby will be shoved and she will really feel where that baby is, but last night I found her baby! How cool is that???

Prayers go up for her ultrasound today and for my brother's wife. She is having an ultra sound too. My Wonderful Sister Inlaw (WSI) has been doing well on staying off her feet. I'm proud of her -- I remember how hard that can be (I was on bed rest most of my second pregnancy. May their ultrasounds bring happy reassurance!